It’s hard to admit it but, I’m a self-confessed narcoleptic. It is just hard for me not to get some sleep. There are days when I feel the symptoms of an addict, thinking of nothing else but my cravings for more sleep. Because of this, I always feel exhausted and then I have to take some anti-depressants and stimulants only to make me zombie-like.
This is my story and this is the same for those with addiction. They may not be identical disorders but this is the best I could come up with to describe the feelings of being addicted to something, you have a need-hate relationship with it.
The Stigma of Addiction
The fact is that we do feel the stigma and the embarrassment of our condition when we try to make our state known to the public. What is worse than struggling with our mental issues are overcoming the scoffers. I even have relatives who would shame me by doubting my love for them in lieu of my addiction.
However, the emotional blackmail does not always work on people with a neurological disorder. Maybe it will work on someone with a different disease but really, you need to understand that we are really going through mental disorder.
What’s more ironic is that when relatives play the emotional card on me, my stress level spikes up which further triggers my cravings. Addicts are usually overwhelmed with stress then feel guilty having to use the substance in the first place.
Certain emotional troubles like family problems or even a new job can push addicts into more frequent substance use.
I try not to think about it. In fact, I avoid situations that tend to compel me to satisfy my cravings. Our urge to succumb may lead to psychological problems as well as issues in our relationship with others over the years.
I question my own sanity. I feel that there is something so wrong with me. However, my psychiatrist comforted me by revealing that depressed and sad people often feel the urge to meet their cravings, be that drugs or sleep. Unfortunately, there is no cure-all solution for us. Some addicts resort to therapy for co-occurring disorders like depression and addiction.
Addiction can easily lead to other problems.
- Research shows that opiate abuse can lead to eating disorders.
- The fact is, substance abuse can make you feel unhinged.
- It makes you feel like you are a completely different person.
Eventually, it can make you lose sight of yourself and your identity. It is no longer you, who is taking illicit drugs all of the time. More often than not, addicted users do not even want to use the substance but their brains have been so changed by the drug being so dependent on the substance that there’s no really way out, or so that’s how it feels.
Recovering addicts even feel like a robot during treatment.
It can take time to find ourselves once more. There’s no real fast fix for anyone with an addiction. What we need is patience, personal exploration, and most importantly, we need understanding.